You are not logged in.


Unread posts
  • "Peppermint Patty" started this thread

Posts: 906

Reg: Jul 17th 2006

Location: london

  • Send private message

1

Monday, August 4th 2008, 7:17pm

not sure what to do.....

hello all.

i know its very early to be here but i am so confused and wanted some advice....or basically a sounding board....really dont know who to talk to about all this without sounding mad....

it took over 2 years to get pg with ds.....i wasnt ovulating, but i went for ovarian drilling and hope we are now "just" left with male factor.....dh's samples have been all over the place......

i was "sold" the ovarian drilling with about a max 3 year shelf life....i had it in nov 07....clomid left me a mess, i used to be crying like a baby and was all over the place, dh is against me taking it again and to be honest, i am not keen either.... i dont think i would be a good mother on it iygwim.... i have ds to think about this time and cant be crying hysterically for no reason at all...dh is also against ICSI after last time and the state i was in...basically i am a pansy and dont take to much well, my body heals so slowly - i was unable to move with the OHSS and so many other nasty things happed to my body....

so the only route is the good old fashion way, i "guess" i am still ovulating as my period are regualrish...really should check - if its a "no" we are in trouble, but if ts a "yes" then i just dont know....

i had these visions of being a mini waltons type family, three kids running around, always having a full house....my mum says i should start trying right away as i dont know when it will happen and if it takes another 8-24 months then i will be glad i did, which i would be but dh isnt so keen and keeps saying to wait till next year...

i just spent so much time hating myself not getting on with it when ttc ds...i dont want to be all bitter or messed up inside for letting a chance now slip away....nor do i want to overload my plate....i just dont know....

please dont think i am being greedy or something. but ds brings me so much joy, i really would like to do it again and have some playmates for him.....

what would you do...?
Peppermint Patty

Me 29 - DH 34
PCOS & Male Factor
TTC 2yrs
3 x Clomid - 3 x BFN
Ovarian Drilling Nov 06
ICSI March 07 - BFP 4/4/7- OHSS - All Gone 12/4/7
ICSI Aug 07 - DR July 13th - Shock NATURAL BFP 25th July 07! - baby boy march 08
May 09 - VERY SHOCKING NATURAL BFP!!!! - Baby Girl Jan 10

JENSQUI

Megastar

Posts: 7,427

Reg: Feb 26th 2007

Location: Edinburgh

Children: one very special daughter

  • Send private message

2

Monday, August 4th 2008, 9:05pm

RE: not sure what to do.....

Hi there,

gosh it's a toughie. I'm not sure I can really help you but you've been such a dear friend to me there was no way I was going to read and run :smile:

you're not being greedy !!! If your DS had come along without all of the heartache that happened beforehand it wouldn't even enter your head that you were being greedy, you'd just just think that wanting another child was normal.

Okay, in an ideal world you would have conceived easily and thinking about having another child wouldn't conjure up fears of ttc stress and upset. You'd probably be thinking about 'spacing' your children to get what you might consider to be the optimum age gap. Sadly this hasn't been an ideal journey for you and I can imagine the thoughts and worries that are going through your head right now (I'd be the same).
How are you doing with motherhood? Has your body recovered? If you started trying now and got pg immediately would you, in all honesty, feel physically up to carrying another baby at the moment? Or would, for example, leaving it another 3 or 4 months (say till after Xmas which really isn't so far away) give you a bit more chance to recover and recoup your energy?

Wish I could be more help but I'm sure one of the other ladies with first-hand experience will be along soon.

xx


me 38, DP 44, ttc since 2005
BFP May 07 - HB seen @ 8 wks but CRL only 7 weeks, m/c @ 9 wks
BFP Jan 08 -m/c @ 11 wks (D&C)
BFP Jun 08 - early loss
BFP Dec 08 - HB & CRL ok @ 8 wks, but sac too small, m/c @ 9 wks
BFP Apr 09 - Martha born 9th Jan 2010
BFP Feb 12 - Eliza born 13th Oct 2012

Posts: 1,071

Reg: Jul 24th 2008

Location: Nottingham

Children: 2 Daughters - we have been blessed!

  • Send private message

3

Monday, August 4th 2008, 9:19pm

It is indeed a toughie. I was lucky enough to conceive on clomid and have a lovely DD. Due to our problems ttc the first time round, we started again fairly soon, and as you may be able to see by signature, nearly 5 years on, we're going the IUI route.

The only ones who know when to try again are both you and your partner, so I would suggest that you talk to each other and come to a compromise of sorts.

Good luck with whatever the future holds!


Me 34 DH 29


Created by MyFitnessPal.com - Free Diet Plans

1st IUI 9th Aug 08
BFP :smile:




Pootle

Megastar

Posts: 7,078

Reg: Mar 31st 2007

Location: By the coast

Children: 2 beautiful girls.

  • Send private message

4

Tuesday, August 5th 2008, 10:26am

Morning!

You're not greedy - you're just trying to fulfill the dreams you had/have. The fact you have been blessed with a son and are grateful to be his Mum doesn't stop you wanting to have another child or wanting him to have a sibling. For me, I was so certain I wanted a sibling for my DD.

As for when to try again - such an individual thing. We were lucky, DD was conceived easily and with no indication that there would be future problems. We started trying again a few months before her 2nd birthday, imagining that it would happen again quickly.

However, I realised something wasn't right fairly quickly, was diagnosed with PCOS, DH with ropey sperm and we tried 5 cycles of clomid before realising we had to step up the ante and go for IVF. We were sooooooooo lucky to get a positive result first time and this baby will arrive when DD is about 3 1/2.

That's all a bit waffley. Where I'm going with it, is that this was the right path for US. I didn't want a huge gap between 2 kids and I wanted to get treatment 'over and done with' so that if it wasn't to be we could explore adoption options. I also thought it would be a good idea to try treatment whilst DD was too young to really understand what was going on.

I'm glad we made the decision we did. If I'd waited a whole year before seeking advice and trying clomid we wouldn't be at the stage we are now. Also, lucky we did make that choice as I was classed as a poor responder, with a low ovarian reserve - if we'd waited longer, who knows what would have happened! But it was the right decision for us - different for everyone.

Maybe a good starting place would be to see whether you are ovulating or not? That way you'd have more of an idea what lies ahead?

And start a diary in the TA section - there's lots of us there and lots of support available!

Good luck making your decision and with whatever path you take.

x






My family is complete...I am grateful every day

DD1, natural miracle, 2005
DD2, IVF miracle, 2008


Posts: 2,934

Reg: Oct 10th 2005

Location: Wales

  • Send private message

5

Thursday, August 7th 2008, 7:33pm

Hi Hunni
Just a quickie to say hi. I like you have been wondering whether or not or when exactly to try again. Like you I can't go thru ISCI again, I'm not a wuss but was so upset after a horrific EC I can't go there again.

I told my Dh I wanted to try FET when A was 1 ( this was when he was about 3 months ), which is next week but he put me off saying no, and we now will decide to go aead after xmas. Quite honestly I don't think I could face the ttc and treatment now, when I want to concentrate on my DS and I know I'm not ready to yet.
With me I am 37 in October and feel I need to do this now rather than later, so an added worry.
I have decided though as much as I want DS to have a sibling, if nothing happens with the FET we'll draw a line under it and no more ttc, not even natural. He is more than we ever thought we could have and makes us truly happy.

Listen to your body chicks, and take a little while to think about it. My dh was right and there's no way we were ready for ttc'ing #2 now.

I hope this helps xxx


Me 39, DH 39 ICSI Nov '06 BFP

FET Dec '10 - ET Dec 16th - Test Day 31/12/10





  • "Peppermint Patty" started this thread

Posts: 906

Reg: Jul 17th 2006

Location: london

  • Send private message

6

Friday, August 8th 2008, 9:16am

thank you all so very much.....

we spoke, still going around in circles but one thing is for sure, its far too early to try again. we need to enjoy our son it will be a stressful time when we do try again even if we dont want it to be iygwim and its too soon for that. also my body is still recovering, stitches are still painful at times....

dh suggests we try next year.....if nothing happens after a time, we can think about out options.....not sure what they are but thats what it is....

thank you all....
Peppermint Patty

Me 29 - DH 34
PCOS & Male Factor
TTC 2yrs
3 x Clomid - 3 x BFN
Ovarian Drilling Nov 06
ICSI March 07 - BFP 4/4/7- OHSS - All Gone 12/4/7
ICSI Aug 07 - DR July 13th - Shock NATURAL BFP 25th July 07! - baby boy march 08
May 09 - VERY SHOCKING NATURAL BFP!!!! - Baby Girl Jan 10

Posts: 2,367

Reg: Dec 6th 2006

Location: plymouth

Children: 1 little boy

  • Send private message

7

Friday, August 8th 2008, 9:33am

PP it is tough aint it and we are already thinking about after i have had this baby and the fact that i managed to concieve naturally after my lap last year and whether we should take contraceptives after the babies born or whether we will have to the same trouble as last time or not and we just cant make a decision either.

xxx

TTC#1 4y
:BFP: 04/09 M/C


Lap 06 endo + scar tissue
Lap 08/07 laser of endo + adhesions

:BFP: 12/07 baby7Lucas born 11/09/08
Now TTC#2 since aug 09(please dont mention on fb)

Posts: 190

Reg: Feb 15th 2008

Location: west sussex

  • Send private message

8

Friday, August 8th 2008, 1:45pm

Hi OLo,

I think this is a subject that runs through most of our heads . I have thought about it and i haven't even got number 1 yet ! Is your DH all clear ? There are lots of factors to consider and it's hard to know how long it may take you ttc again. Maybe it would be nice to enjoy number 1 before you have the stress of ttc number 2. But it's different for each couple.

Any way best of luck with this one, not long to go now !

:goodluck: blowkiss
Emy

:xxx3:





Posts: 2,367

Reg: Dec 6th 2006

Location: plymouth

Children: 1 little boy

  • Send private message

9

Friday, August 8th 2008, 2:36pm

yeh my dh is all clear and i do want to enjoy number 1 first i think we should leave it a year but then its looking at contraceptives and what to use. We keep saying one thing then another just dont really no.

TTC#1 4y
:BFP: 04/09 M/C


Lap 06 endo + scar tissue
Lap 08/07 laser of endo + adhesions

:BFP: 12/07 baby7Lucas born 11/09/08
Now TTC#2 since aug 09(please dont mention on fb)

Posts: 190

Reg: Feb 15th 2008

Location: west sussex

  • Send private message

10

Friday, August 8th 2008, 2:56pm

That's a hard one. I was on the pill for a while before TTC but it wasn't for me. Maybe comdoms would be good if you can cope with using them all the time, as with them when you are ready to start again you can just stop using them straight away. With most other contraceptives you need to have a little break when you stop using it before you start ttc. Normally 3 months break if i remember rightly and you will have to use comdoms during that time to. So it depends i guess how long you want to leave it. If you are only thinking of one years gap and you take into consideration you may not be interested for a little while after your baby has been born and having to use them for 3 months before wanting to ttc again, you would only actually be on contraceptive for 6 months( hope that makes sense ). My facts maybe wrong as things have changed since i last looked at contraceptives.
Emy

:xxx3:





  • "Peppermint Patty" started this thread

Posts: 906

Reg: Jul 17th 2006

Location: london

  • Send private message

11

Friday, August 8th 2008, 6:32pm

we have decided agianst the pill - dont want to take up a chance and play with my hormones....
Peppermint Patty

Me 29 - DH 34
PCOS & Male Factor
TTC 2yrs
3 x Clomid - 3 x BFN
Ovarian Drilling Nov 06
ICSI March 07 - BFP 4/4/7- OHSS - All Gone 12/4/7
ICSI Aug 07 - DR July 13th - Shock NATURAL BFP 25th July 07! - baby boy march 08
May 09 - VERY SHOCKING NATURAL BFP!!!! - Baby Girl Jan 10

Posts: 2,367

Reg: Dec 6th 2006

Location: plymouth

Children: 1 little boy

  • Send private message

12

Friday, August 8th 2008, 7:09pm

PP that is exactly how i feel about the pill and i had a coil years ago and would not have another one

TTC#1 4y
:BFP: 04/09 M/C


Lap 06 endo + scar tissue
Lap 08/07 laser of endo + adhesions

:BFP: 12/07 baby7Lucas born 11/09/08
Now TTC#2 since aug 09(please dont mention on fb)

Posts: 696

Reg: Feb 8th 2007

Location: Sheffield

  • Send private message

13

Friday, August 8th 2008, 7:25pm

PP i don't know if this helps, you may just tell me to keep my nose out but somebody I work with had fertility issues for years. I think they were ttc for 41/2 to 5 years. They had IVF but it didn't work. Last year they got a natural BFP and their baby, Max was born in December. Then, shockingly for them, they conceived again in March so there second baby is due in December a few days before their eldests first birthday. It would seem that their natural BFP has made them very fertile.
Just wanted to tell you this. I don't really know your ttc history so I may be speaking out of turn but just wanted to share this with you.





Me - 29 +1 DH - 35 Male Factor


  • "Peppermint Patty" started this thread

Posts: 906

Reg: Jul 17th 2006

Location: london

  • Send private message

14

Sunday, August 10th 2008, 12:34pm

thanks rachy - but i dont know. thats what was said after my hsg....and no luck - its all so hit and miss and thats whats confusing.
Peppermint Patty

Me 29 - DH 34
PCOS & Male Factor
TTC 2yrs
3 x Clomid - 3 x BFN
Ovarian Drilling Nov 06
ICSI March 07 - BFP 4/4/7- OHSS - All Gone 12/4/7
ICSI Aug 07 - DR July 13th - Shock NATURAL BFP 25th July 07! - baby boy march 08
May 09 - VERY SHOCKING NATURAL BFP!!!! - Baby Girl Jan 10

Posts: 2,367

Reg: Dec 6th 2006

Location: plymouth

Children: 1 little boy

  • Send private message

15

Sunday, August 10th 2008, 8:55pm

it is confusing me and dh keep talking about it and everytime we have a different outcome

TTC#1 4y
:BFP: 04/09 M/C


Lap 06 endo + scar tissue
Lap 08/07 laser of endo + adhesions

:BFP: 12/07 baby7Lucas born 11/09/08
Now TTC#2 since aug 09(please dont mention on fb)

  • "Peppermint Patty" started this thread

Posts: 906

Reg: Jul 17th 2006

Location: london

  • Send private message

16

Friday, January 9th 2009, 11:28pm

this month i was 10 days late....since the ovarian drilling i have been like clockwork - there is no way i was pg or i had a missed mc - i have just bulk ordered ovulation kits and now there is a sense of foreboding - back to being me, back to that life, i dont want to be in that place.

i know i have a wonderful ds and please forgive my greed.i dont even know what it is - maybe i am being even more selfish - but its about being that broken person again - i have been "functional" and liked it.

i am still exhausted from ds, i am not in a place to think about trying again and i am annoyed that once again its not my choice......more months like this cant be good....

do you know it would be cheaper for me to have another drilling op rather than icsi - and if it works again i have ovulation on my side and just hope one of dh's swimmers come up trumps again! it would be less invasive and easier! i dont know if you can even be "drilled" twice. like i said there is no more ICSI for us....

ramblings of a mad woman.....but thank you for reading......
Peppermint Patty

Me 29 - DH 34
PCOS & Male Factor
TTC 2yrs
3 x Clomid - 3 x BFN
Ovarian Drilling Nov 06
ICSI March 07 - BFP 4/4/7- OHSS - All Gone 12/4/7
ICSI Aug 07 - DR July 13th - Shock NATURAL BFP 25th July 07! - baby boy march 08
May 09 - VERY SHOCKING NATURAL BFP!!!! - Baby Girl Jan 10

Jodie

Megastar

Posts: 7,078

Reg: Mar 31st 2007

Location: By the coast

Children: 2 beautiful girls.

  • Send private message

17

Friday, January 9th 2009, 11:45pm

Hi PP. Never apologise for being greedy (or a mad woman!)! All the girls in the TA section totally understand the desire for another child - and I think there are lots of different reasons for wanting another one - but its not 'wrong' to think like that!

I was slightly different to you in that I had secondary infertility so it was the first time I'd experienced not being able to conceive when I wanted. However I do understand the feeling of being broken and being so cross with my body for not being able to do something that so many people take for granted and do so easily. Its not an easy thing to get your head round is it?

As for the future - I have no idea about whether you can have ovarian drilling twice. Is it possible for you to speak to the consultant who did it last time? Your DS is little yet - maybe just enjoy him a bit more before deciding about future treatment or ICSI?

Anyway, hugs to you - if you want a chat, please PM me or we can ramble away here if it helps!

x






My family is complete...I am grateful every day

DD1, natural miracle, 2005
DD2, IVF miracle, 2008


cookie

Superstar

  • "cookie" is no longer a member of FZ

Posts: 5,210

  • Send private message

18

Friday, January 9th 2009, 11:48pm

you are not a mad woman and you are not greedy....

to want your child to have a sibbling is the most natural thing in the world. and now you know what it is to have a child...you know how wonderful it would be to have 2, 3, 4.... there is no shame or greed in that. it is a wonderful thing.

have you spoken to someone about being drilled again? it sounds perfect for you...if it is available for a second time.

sending you lots of love, and i know how tiring a 10 month is...i couldnt have made the ttc decision alone at that stage, wait until you are both happy to ttc again and enjoy your gorgeous boy in the mean time:]

love k xxx



I'm running down the road like loose electricity, while the band in my head plays a strip tease!



  • "Peppermint Patty" started this thread

Posts: 906

Reg: Jul 17th 2006

Location: london

  • Send private message

19

Wednesday, June 3rd 2009, 9:39pm

hello everyone. just thought i would pop in for a quick update
it seems that i may have had an early loss in dec as since my ovarian drilling till dec and after dec my periods are regular...i thought it was an ovary failing but i think that wasnt the case....i missed my period again this month and once again blamed it on the lazy ovary, but it seems i am pg! i am in a daze! i dont mean to brag but, i havent opened the 5 bulk packs of ovulation sticks! i have booked a private scan for monday and hope and pray everything will be ok. i wasnt looking after myself as i have been busy looking after a very active ds but i dont feel pg so am really waiting for monday to see if everything is ok. i am terrified that i havent been so lucky and that the scan will hold no good news.....
Peppermint Patty

Me 29 - DH 34
PCOS & Male Factor
TTC 2yrs
3 x Clomid - 3 x BFN
Ovarian Drilling Nov 06
ICSI March 07 - BFP 4/4/7- OHSS - All Gone 12/4/7
ICSI Aug 07 - DR July 13th - Shock NATURAL BFP 25th July 07! - baby boy march 08
May 09 - VERY SHOCKING NATURAL BFP!!!! - Baby Girl Jan 10

Jodie

Megastar

Posts: 7,078

Reg: Mar 31st 2007

Location: By the coast

Children: 2 beautiful girls.

  • Send private message

20

Wednesday, June 3rd 2009, 10:20pm

Hi PP. So sorry to hear about your loss in December. However, I'm delighted to hear that you've had another BFP! Congrats.

Everyone feels differently during pregnancy and each pregnancy is different - mine definitely were so keep the PMA going and I hope you get good news on Monday. Let us know how you get on!

x






My family is complete...I am grateful every day

DD1, natural miracle, 2005
DD2, IVF miracle, 2008


  • "Peppermint Patty" started this thread

Posts: 906

Reg: Jul 17th 2006

Location: london

  • Send private message

21

Wednesday, July 1st 2009, 11:00pm

qiuck update...i had another scan and it seems i am 9 weeks pg - so baby growing....fingers crossed.!
Peppermint Patty

Me 29 - DH 34
PCOS & Male Factor
TTC 2yrs
3 x Clomid - 3 x BFN
Ovarian Drilling Nov 06
ICSI March 07 - BFP 4/4/7- OHSS - All Gone 12/4/7
ICSI Aug 07 - DR July 13th - Shock NATURAL BFP 25th July 07! - baby boy march 08
May 09 - VERY SHOCKING NATURAL BFP!!!! - Baby Girl Jan 10

  • "SingingNun" is no longer a member of FZ
  • United Kingdom

Posts: 2,125

Reg: Feb 8th 2006

Location: Here, There & Everywhere

Children: Rebecca, born 12th March 2008

  • Send private message

22

Thursday, July 2nd 2009, 7:06am

yeah!!!!! Congratulations PP!

xxx Lorraine xxx

Me: 39 & DH: 42 ~ TTC: 5yrs; M/c@7.5wks (20/1/03) & became a mum after our 2nd IUI attempt in June 2007 to 6lbs 4ozs baby girl called Rebecca after an emergency caesarean section at 6.29am on 12th March 2008


    United Kingdom

Posts: 15,284

Reg: Sep 24th 2006

Location: Up to my armpits in ironing

Children: Three gorgeous daughters!

Thanks: 100 / 90

  • Send private message

23

Thursday, July 2nd 2009, 9:19am

That's fantastic news PP!!! Congratulations!! :D

xxx


Angel baby April 07, Angel baby December 07, DD1 August 09, DD2 March 11, DD3 October 13

JENSQUI

Megastar

Posts: 7,427

Reg: Feb 26th 2007

Location: Edinburgh

Children: one very special daughter

  • Send private message

24

Thursday, July 2nd 2009, 10:43am

:D

XX


me 38, DP 44, ttc since 2005
BFP May 07 - HB seen @ 8 wks but CRL only 7 weeks, m/c @ 9 wks
BFP Jan 08 -m/c @ 11 wks (D&C)
BFP Jun 08 - early loss
BFP Dec 08 - HB & CRL ok @ 8 wks, but sac too small, m/c @ 9 wks
BFP Apr 09 - Martha born 9th Jan 2010
BFP Feb 12 - Eliza born 13th Oct 2012

Posts: 2,643

Reg: Feb 28th 2007

Location: Surrey

Children: Not yet

  • Send private message

25

Thursday, July 2nd 2009, 11:26am

Great news PP :D

X
TTC naturally, five miscarriages 2006-2009, Immune issues

BLONDIE'S IMMUNOLOGY DIARY

Jodie

Megastar

Posts: 7,078

Reg: Mar 31st 2007

Location: By the coast

Children: 2 beautiful girls.

  • Send private message

26

Friday, July 3rd 2009, 11:02pm

That's great news PP!

x






My family is complete...I am grateful every day

DD1, natural miracle, 2005
DD2, IVF miracle, 2008


compley

Megastar

Posts: 6,056

Reg: Apr 30th 2006

Children: DS and DD

  • Send private message

27

Sunday, July 5th 2009, 7:30pm

Congratulations xxx



<




FERTILITYZONE



MEDHURST – PROUD HOSTS OF FERTILITYZONE