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  • "dizzy-forever" started this thread

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Reg: Dec 16th 2013

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Monday, December 16th 2013, 6:28pm

Please help!! Men's advice needed!!

Hi Everyone, I'm new here and still trying to find my way around. I'm also not very up to date on the technical terms for everything.

Here is our brief as possible.

Me and my partner have been TTC for around 2 years. We have been to the doctor and all of my blood tests came back ok.

Since then, he has been for a sperm analysis and the results were not very good, I'm not sure about everything the Dr said but basically
he a normal sperm count but and a very low % are normal shaped. We are both mid to late 20's.

He is struggling really hard with this news, he is devastated and blames himself. I am being supportive but could do with a male opinion and some
advice on how to help. I don't know if it makes him feel less of a man or something?
It's also something we both can't talk about without getting extremely upset.
We are struggling with this privately (no family or friends know)
There is a lot of talk about future grandchildren from parents and it is so hard to hear knowing that may never happen and we don't want to tell anyone until
we have a definite answer or more information from the Dr.

He also has always had a healthy lifestyle, no smoking, hardly any drinking and no drugs.

We just don't know what to make of it all.... :tear:

Please help!!



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Monday, December 16th 2013, 7:48pm

Hi, there is a really interesting post on this thread (by Paul Entwistle) that sums up the different way men and women deal with infertility. It may not all be relevant but it gives a good insight.

He is leaving me as cant deal with never having his own children

6 x IVF, 4 x FET
3 x MMC, 3 x :BFN:, 1 x failed thaw
Two gorgeous boys.



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Monday, December 16th 2013, 8:37pm

Hi dizzy,

We started off in a similar way and my husband was just the quiet type about it all. We ended up going down the ivf route and at that point his sample came back good quality after 3 poor results previously. The only thing he did differently was take fertility vitamins and had a couple acupuncture sessions. When we had ivf we had a very low fertilisation rate and it turned out to b most likely due to the receptors on the eggs and not the sperm at all. That's something that can't be tested for and all my previous tests had come back fine.
What I'm saying is that overall it is something u are both going through and it doesn't really matter who has what medical problem.
We have now told our parents who are a good support so no ackward grand kids questions although they don't really understand treatment etc

I hope u get some more answers from ur doctor
Pip :thumbup:

1st IVF Nov 2013 - mmc (blighted ovum)
2nd IVF ICSI sept 2014 - freeze all
Dec2014 FET :BFP: :BFP: it's twins xxx



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Monday, December 16th 2013, 10:04pm

Hi Dizzy,

At my clinic the level at which they class morphology to be OK or acceptable it 4%. Therefore you can still have a low percentage of correctly shaped sperm for it to be considered normal, or possible to conceive.
I am guessing that your DP's sperm has come back at less than 4% but can I ask how many samples has he given?
My DH's samples did vary quite a lot, so its worth having the analysis repeated at least one more time.

I would give similar advice to Pip. My DH had relatively healthy lifestyle too, but we found cutting out alcohol completely and taking vitamins and minerals really improved sperm quality. Could have just been luck though!!

This thread here is really good if you havent seen it already. LIFE IN THE LAB - FOR ALL OF YOUR SPERM QUESTIONS

Over the past 2 years or so, my DH has blamed himself too for us not conceiving naturally. I used to tell him all the time that we could never be 100% sure that the problem WAS down to him - its just easier for the docs to pinpoint a POSSIBLE problem being with the man. The chances are that plenty of couples have men with poor or sub-optimal sperm quality or count, but they do conceive so they are never any the wiser.

Have you been referred to a clinic now?

Good luck!

TTC since 2010
ICSI May 2013 - :BFN:
ICSI # 2 Oct 2013 - :BFP:
21 Nov 13 - [zx076] [zx076] seen at first scan! :faint:
Jul 2014 - bab21 bab22

  • "dizzy-forever" started this thread

Posts: 3

Reg: Dec 16th 2013

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Tuesday, December 17th 2013, 8:16am

Thank you for your replies. yeah he ia having a 2nd sample done today. I don't think our dr really knew a lot because he just said a specialist can help you and tell you more. I think we will get referred after this sample result gets back. I keep saying do not blame yourself but he keeps a lot in and I have said we need to communicate with each other. the results came back at 3% and dr didnt say a lot more so I think this has taken him by extreme shock. we will go to the specialist and see what are our options but even with us both working full time we arent in the financial position to go down the route of paying for ivf or anything.
thank you everyone the vitamins are definitely worth a try...

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