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  • "coxyloxy" started this thread

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Reg: May 21st 2010

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Friday, October 7th 2011, 5:27pm

No adoption if own child is under 5?


Our DS is 3 and we would really like to kick-start the adoption process (we want to adopt a child, irrespective of whether we ever have another child of our own).

Our local authority won't even let you register for adoption and go through the process unless your youngest child is 5. So we are looking at another 3 years before we are potentially approved for adoption.

Has anyone else come across this? If we adopted from abroad, we have to be pproved by our local social services and so there doesn't seem to be any way around this.

Or are we missing something? Any guidance would be gratefully received!

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Friday, October 7th 2011, 7:12pm

Hi Coxyloxy,
I think I read that the adoption agencies prefer your biological children to be at least 3 years older than your adopted children. So perhaps they want to wait until your DS is 5 so that by the time you are approved etc, you can adopt a child up to age 3?
I'm sorry but I don't know any more than that. I hope someone can be of more help soon,

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Saturday, October 8th 2011, 10:48pm


I believe the reasons they want a good gap between the childrens ages is due to the complex nature of a child coming to you through adoption. Most children who come through the care system have delayed emotionalbehaviour and some have developmental delay so it is imperative that if you already have a child their needs would be different to what your adopted childs would be. Time needs to be totally invested in getting the new child to attach and build a relationship with an already established and bonded family.

our DD will be 7 when we adopt again and we are looking for a child of around 2 1/2 or 3, so at least 4 years difference. Enjoy your little one as they just grow so fast dont they

Good luck xx

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Saturday, November 19th 2011, 5:43pm

I was turned down by my local council and an agency for adopting. The reason..........I haven't a spare bedroom. Was told to move to a bigger house and then I could start the process but no guarantees. So its best for a child to go through the care system within Childrens homes and FC but not have a secure forever home and share a bedroom.